Yes my friends, I am back. A Vacation Story. In order for this one to make sense, you must be familiar with the vampiring vampire story.
Last month our family took what may have been our last summer vacation all together. A lovely little jaunt through the corn fields of Iowa and Nebraska, we enjoyed all sorts of the usual, old houses of people who were almost famous, presidential spots, museums, zoos, etc. But, the most fun was had just sitting around, in the car and of course at meals. As many of my friends have said, "a meal with the Schultz's is never boring".
Wendy and I, involved in a good old-fashioned spat, were arguing over or discussing something, I don't remember what. Responding to some comment she made that perturbed me, I raised my right hand up, back of the hand facing her, index and middle finger split apart in a backward peace sign, "up your kilt" sort of gesture. "It's a 'v' for vampire" I glared at her. "Oh yeah," she raised her hand in like manner, but with her fingers closed. "It's a 'u' for umpire," she retorted. "Just wait," I declared, knowing fair well I could not give her the correct following gesture in front of the family, "Mommy isn't always watching." Katrina piped in, "but Santa is!"
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