Tuesday, April 29, 2003

Why My Mommy Rocks

This one's not exactly a story, it's special. I don't want you to think my mommy's a party pooper just because she shows up at the end of most of my stories to reprimand us - she was just doing her job as "mommy". So, to show you how truly wonderful she is:
The Top Ten Reasons My Mommy Rocks

10. She's an Alpha Xi (like me)
9. She's always supportive
8. She's taught me so much (except she can't seem to teach me to do the vampire face instead of the blood-sucking toad)
7. She sews us clothes (and taught me how to, too)
6. She sings songs with us at dinner (including sorority songs)
5. She still colors with me at the kitchen table
4. She loves me
3. She plays games with us (even Twister)
2. She's beautiful
And, the #1 reason my mommy rocks:
..She puts up with me :)

When I grow up, I want to be just like my mommy.


Snow Fight!

Here's another story about snow. Another General Story

Senior year of high-school, Wendy, Suse, our friend Dan and I all carpooled together in the "Owl Mobile" (aka "Ghetto Cruiser", aka "Teen Mobile"), a 1989 grey pontiac 6000 with a kick-ass stereo in it. Every day we would drive to and from school singing and having a blast - but that's another story.

One winter we had all gotten into a bit of a snow fight while walking to the car and in good Schultz fashion, we couldn't just drop it...

The whole way to Dan's house, and then home from there, we rolled down the windows to scoop snow off the roof, opened doors at stops to scoop snow off the medians, and picked up snow from the floor of the car - and chucked it at each other with mad flurry. Except at me (hee hee), there was a "no throwing snow at the driver unless stopped" rule for safety. It was great fun and we all got home rosy from the cold and a little damp from the melting snow (you can't turn the heat off in the car).

[Notice: this story does not have an "UH-Oh, Mommy showed up part because she probably didn't know until reading this.]


Winter War

Ok, 3 more to go to make up for this past weekend.
Another General Story

The NG wasn't just a summer group, we played together in winter too. We really enjoyed playing in the front yard after (or during) a large snowfall. Normally each of us would create a slide or tunnel out of our designate snowbank, but one time we decided to add some extra fun. Beyond a normal snowball fight, we created an all out war. The object of this war, like most, was to capture the most territory. We took out the small American flags given out at summer parades so we could mark our beginning territories. One team was the right side up flags, the other, upside down. We placed our flags, in their respective positions, in our snowbanks and the war commenced.

In order to capture a territory, one needed only to turn the flag to their position. Sounds easy, right - nope. As typical in winter, our weapons were snowballs; if we got hit with one, we were injured and had to lay down on the ground right where we were until our teammates could rescue us. In order to do this, they had to hoist the "injured" person onto a saucer and pull it back to one of their teams snowbanks. All this had to be done while still defending the banks in possession and attempting to get new ones. Needless to say, it was much easier when Katrina or Jennifer got hit than one of us older people. It was loads of fun until Wendy got hit in the face with a supposed ice-ball and ran inside crying. Then a very angry Mommy showed up at the door, I got yelled at, and we all had to go home for the night. :( I don't even know if anybody won.

Feeding the Pandas

Oh boy! I owe a great many back entries at this point, sorry folks. Let's jump right in:
A General Story

When we were little, there a was beautiful birch tree in our backyard near the swing-set. On summer Daddy decided the tree needed some trimming (I think it was growing over the garage), so he went to work and created a nice big pile of birch branches and logs. Wendy and I, with our ever-over-active imaginations, declared this wood "bamboo" because that's what we fathomed bamboo to look like.

Now, of course, where there is bamboo there are panda bears. So we decided to feed the poor starving pandas who couldn't get to the piles of bamboo near the garage. Wendy and I would gather up arm fulls of the tree pieces, little sticks for the baby pandas, and the larger branches for the mommy and daddy pandas. We would get the food to the pandas by laying some of it in an open area of the yard and then booking it as fast our little legs could carry us to the safety of the back door - pandas are big and strong and bears are very dangerous for little girls. We would watch through the screen door, pointing out to each other, "look there's a mommy and a baby eating that piece" or "there's a big one by that pile."

After we had scattered much of the birch trimmings around the yard Mommy came along (this usually means "UH-OH"). She was upset we had ruined Daddy's nice neat pile of tree branches by scattering the entire back yard with leaves and branches. For some reason, the explanation that we were feeding the pandas didn't go over too well.


Friday, April 25, 2003

I Used to Think...

This one is a little different in that I may add to it as I remember things: A General Story.

When I was little, I used to think Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur were special Girl Scout holidays because they were on my Girl Scout calender and nowhere else.

When I was little, I used to think it was called "Silicon Valley" because most of the woman there had fake breasts.

When I was little, I used to think all dogs were males and all cats were females - like roosters and chickens. Not sure why, possibly because my id bracelet has a dog and a cat with a heart in between them and becasue dogs act like men whereas cats act like women.


Thursday, April 24, 2003

Why I was Afraid of the Basement

And the promised second story of the day: General Story

Our old house in St. Francis had a really freaky basement. The doors were big heavy wood (well, big and heavy to a little girl) and were decorated with wrought iron hinges and huge door knockers that we called "Freddy-Krueger handles". In the back room, diagonal from the furnace, was a small room used as a storage closet. The corner of the basement it was situated in was rather dark, adding to the spookiness. Opening the big wooden door always scared me, inside the small room, one lone window cast eerie shadows, everything was dusty and it smelled like damp basement - but the scariest part was the first thing you'd see upon opening the door. There, on the wall right across from the doorway hung... a framed poster of Billy Idol! Talk about traumatic for a 7 year old!



Ok, Ok, I've been bad again and missed yesterday - so 2 stories it is! The first one today: a Summer Story

As you may know from previous entries, the NG had our own "production company", NG Basement Productions, which made movies and did productions. One summer we did Aladdin (unfortunately we did not get this one on tape). We chose this not only because we all loved it, but also because we had some of the costumes. A previous Halloween Katrina had gone as Jasmine and I had gone as Jafar. Jasmine was a purchased costume but Jafar, like most of our Halloween costumes, Mommy made. It was wonderful, looked just like his outfit, the shoulder "wings" were so large I had to walk sideways to fit through doors!

For our production, Katrina played Jasmine, Wendy played Aladdin, Jennifer played Genie, Gina played the dude at the beginning and sometimes Jafar (we traded off a bit). We didn't do the whole movie really, but did little routines while lip-syncing to the soundtrack.

Gina started the show with the introduction, using a yellow flashlight for the lamp and after "this is no ordinary lamp" exclaiming, "this is not a lamp" and launching it behind her. When Wendy did "One Jump Ahead", the rest of us also were on "stage" (the carpet of the basement floor) doing the background parts. The best was when Gina would put on the plastic glasses with fake cardboard eyes on them and sing, "still I think he's rather tasty". Jennifer's Genie costume was a long blue dress that was really part of an old Alice-in-Wonderland costume, but to make it more Genie-ish we pinned on a blue net "tail" from Wendy's 4 yr old tap recital costume. But, the most creative part of the whole show was "A Whole New World". Katrina and Wendy sat on a small rug in the middle of the stage, the other three of us split, Jennifer and Gina on one side of the rug and me on the other, all off the stage. The three of us tossed the pool basketball and volleyball back and forth in front of and behind the rug. Why? Because the crepe paper tails we had taped on the balls formed our clouds making the magic carpet fly! It was great fun and we all still remember most of the words to the songs.

(Originally posted April 24, 2003.)


Wednesday, April 23, 2003

Breakfast Songs

And now, the second story for today. A General Story . This one's short and sweet.

Growing up breakfast with Daddy usually included him singing to us. And what kind of songs does a father sing to his elementary aged children?

"I wear my sunglasses at night, so I can, so I can, see...."

"I used to love my girls, when they were all in curls, then they discovered boys, who have much neater toys. And now I only hope, that I can learn to cope, with son-in-laws named Spike, whom I don't even like."

"And where do we go from here, which is the way that's clear? Still looking for my blue-eyed baby queen, prettiest girl I'd ever seen. See her shake on the movie screen, Jimmy Dean, James Dean."

And of course, the best thing for young girls - often recited as poetry:
"One pill makes you larger, and one pill makes you small, but the one's that mother gives you don't do anything at all. Go ask Alice."

(Originally posted April 22, 2003.)


Crossing the Street

Ok, ok, I forgot again yesterday - so 2 stories it is!
First - a Classic from when I was little. This story was told to me by my parents, hopefully I have the details correct.

When I was little, my parents made sure to teach me the things I would need to know to stay safe. A very important rule: Never cross the street or alley without holding someone's hand.
One time, when I was 2, my parents found me out back behind our house - on the other side of the alley! Uh oh - bad girl. They reprimanded me and reminded me that I was told not to cross without holding someone's hand. Always one to follow (or bend) the rules, I replied, "I did, I held my own hands."
Lots of people thought this was cute, my mother was worried. She should have been - I was already a smart-ass at 2!

(Originally posted April 22. 2008.)


Sunday, April 20, 2003

"Hey, You Footed Me"

As promised, another story to make up for yesterday. This one isn't exactly from childhood, but it is a classic. A Suse Story

Senior year of high school my family hosted a wonderful exchange student named Suse. The epitome of Deutschland, she had rosy round cheeks, blue eyes and blond hair - everything but the German accent. Everyone loved Suse, and with good reason too, besides being absolutely adorable, she was also smart, cute and innocent. Every day our little group ate lunch together at the same table in the cafeteria.

Now, they say english is a tricky language to learn, and I believe them, Suse demonstrated it first hand. You know how when someone hits you with their elbow you say they "elbowed" you. Or if you hit someone with your knee, you "kneed" them. Well, Suse thought that this must be correct for all body parts. Once I kicked her and she said, "hey you footed me."
It didn't take long to realize this misunderstanding could be very amusing. So at lunch, as we all sat eating, I would sit and poke Suse's arm. She would try ignoring it, going on with her conversation...but finally she couldn't take anymore. She swatted my arm away yelling as loud as she could, "Stop fingering me!"
(Talk about getting people's attention)

(Originally posted April 20, 2003.)


Roof Volleyball

Sorry I forgot to add a story yesterday, will have to do two today. Happy Easter.
And yet another Summer Story.

Everyone has favorite games they played around the neighborhood when they were little: tag, hide and go seek, duck duck goose, etc. We played all these too, but we had our own special games. Although "city" (see future entry) comes close, by far the most popular was/is "roof volleyball". (All those ESPN 7 fans out there, feel free to add your memories of this wonderful game in the comments section!)

During beautiful summer days the NG would gather together in our swimsuits and shorts, ready for a tough game of roof volleyball. Our team, "the frosted flakes" (we're grrreat!), would gather on the grass in front of the house and make some crucial decisions. We wouldn't pick teams or anything like that, we all played against the roof - we had to settle on court size. See, the lower level roof stretches all the way across the front of the house, over the garage and porch. If we played ultimate court, that meant using the whole lower roof - which meant playing on the driveway as well as the grass. this was usually used for games in which our team numbered over 7 players since none of us particularly enjoyed diving on pavement. If we played large court, that meant the grass (from the right edge of the roof) to the driveway line. We used this side more when we were older and had at least 5 people playing. But our standard court as youngsters stretched only from that right edge of the roof to the edge of the bushes in front of the porch entrance,a distance of about 8ft.

Everyone would select their positions. (5 players meant 2 in front, 2 in back and one middle; 4 was 2 front, 2 back; 3, 2 front, 1 back; with 2 or 1 it was pretty much a free for all.)
We played by what we considered standard volleyball rules. The game began with volleying the plastic playground ball between us and the roof in order to decide which team would serve. When we served, the person in the back corner would hit the ball either over hand or under. More often than not, the ball hit the tree on the right, rather than the roof on the left. (But what do you except from a 7 year old?) When the roof served, one of us simply threw the ball up on the roof and let it roll off and into play.

My parents used to sit on the porch to watch us play, but they soon learned this was not a safe area to view from. Wild serves and volleys would crash into their chairs or thud against the living room windows.

Out of bounds meant over the imaginary lines drawn down from the above mentioned boundaries, behind us or under the roof (onto the porch). The only way we scored was if the roof hit the ball out of bounds. So, if we served the ball onto the roof and the roof returned it by rolling it onto the driveway - point for us! The roof scored or regained control of the ball whenever we failed to hit it back onto the roof (a common place event when a team consisting of people between 4 and 5 ft plays a roof 8ft high at it's lowest). The roof earned many of its points by spiking the ball. If our team returned a roof play and hit the underside of the roof - the roof spiked it pretty much straight down with little chance for us to hit it back. If we were lucky, it spiked into the garden between the grass and the porch, this counted as out of bounds. otherwise, if it spiked unto the grass, roof's ball :(.

We played until 15, with of course, requiring that 2 point gap to actually win. It was a long time before we beat the roof - we still don't sometimes. But it's a great game and anyone who's played it can testify to the great fun and enjoyment created by roof volleyball. Come over and play sometime!

(Originally posted April 20, 2003.)


Friday, April 18, 2003

Name That Song

I don't have a story related to Good Friday, so here's another Summer Story

One of the NG's favorite games through-out our many summers was "name that song". As a group, we never failed to amuse ourselves, and this game proved perfect for bad weather days.
My parents had a 5 disc cd changer, and there were 5 of us, so we each would pick out one cd. After placing them in the cd player and setting it on shuffle, we took a large magazine and hung it off the top of the cd player. (opening it and placing half on top so the other half hung over the display) This prevented us from using the track #s to figure out the song. Then we all sat on the couch and waited for the music to begin. As soon as anyone thought they new what song it was, they would jump up and yell the title. Then that person would go up to the cd player, peek under the magazine for the track # and compare it to the cd cases lined up on top of the equipment. If they were wrong, they would sit back down and other people would begin to guess. If they were right, the fun really began.

The lucky "winner" could then decide if they would perform a concert or a music video. If they selected a music video, everyone else remained on the couch and "critiqued" the video as the performer danced and lip-synced around the room. If they chose concert, all hell broke loose. Everyone on the couch became the audience and could rush the "stage" and performer at anytime. Either choice, we had a blast! Sometimes we even brought up dress-up clothes from the basement and went all out!

(Originally posted April 18, 2003.)


Thursday, April 17, 2003

World Communion

A Church Story
Since it is Maundy Thursday, I think a communion story might be in order. :)

At Tippie, the church we went to when I was little, the communion was passed around in silver platters - except on World Communion Sunday. On that Sunday, the pastor held the loaf of bread at the front of the church and elders held the grape-juice off to either side. Now, in the Presbyterian church there is no specified age for a first communion so I don't remember how old my sister was, but we were sitting on the left side of the church so it was in our later years there - she was probably about 7 or 8.
In preparation for receiving the "bread and wine" we filed out into the aisle, my sister in front because she had been sitting on the center end of the pew. As we neared the pastor, we could see the people in front of us taking small pieces off the loaf. Luckily, we sat very close to the front so by the time we reached the loaf, most people had gotten their bread. Why is this a good thing? Because my sister reached up and took half the loaf! When we got back to the pew I was very upset with her and told her she shouldn't have done that. - Her response, "I'm hungry!" She then sat and ate the bread for the remainder of the service.

***Wendy claims she only took that amount because it's what came off. Either way, she still told me she was hungry and continued to eat it.

(Originally posted April 17, 2003.)


Wednesday, April 16, 2003

The Little Vampire

My Sister, The Vampire
One night, when I was 9 or 10, I lay in my bed reading. It was bedtime, and I often read a book before going to sleep. It was quite warm in my room that night, so the covers were more under me than on top of me. I was enjoying my book when my little sister, just a toddler, waddled into my room. I said hi to her but she didn't respond, so I looked at her. She didn't pause, just waddled right up to my bed, leaned over and bit my hip. Then she turned and ran out of the room taking some of my skin with her.
I went downstairs to tell Mommy. She didn't believe me because Katrina was supposedly in bed, besides - why would she bite me? Then I showed Mommy the teeth marks and the owie that was now bleeding.
My sister still thinks she's a vampire, but she stopped biting people (for the most part) a few yrs ago.

(Originally posted April 16, 2003.)



I am contemplating continuing my daily childhood stories in the memories section (Can't lose them!) and using this as a regular journal. However, since if you are reading this it will probably effect you, I want opinions. If I do this, it will not be a place where I make odd comments in regards to small anonymous incidents, rather, in my true brutal honesty fashion, this will simply be typing in what I write in my regular books. I will enter back-entries as I have time. This means that if I was mad at you on say March 10th of 2001, it might say some not-so-nice things. It also means you may find out more than you wanted to know about me (esp. if you're my mother) or it could satisfy your curiosity of what goes on in my head. I am interested in sharing this since I believe in being an open-person, but I do not want to do it at the expense of hurting others, esp those I care enough about to include in my memories of life. Please respond to this and let me know how you feel about the addition of such, of restrictions wanted or censoring/editing desired. Thanks, Me.

(Originally Posted on April 16, 2003.)


Tuesday, April 15, 2003

The Sea Monster and the Pea!?

Summer Stories

One summer day at home, the NG grew tired of the same old same old and decided to do something really fun and new. We wanted to touch the ceiling..but how? So we went up to my room which had a day bed at the time and tried standing on that. Not everyone could reach, but then...we got a brilliant idea. We went through the house and took every twin size mattress we could find, including the one off the trundle. We stacked them all on my bed and then put blankets on top. It was quite the tower - 4 mattresses! Then we climbed up on top of the bed (this was no easy task) and pretended it was a ship. We would take turns being a sea monster that would try to pull the others off the "ship". Of course pretty soon some of the blankets were on the floor, and then top mattresses began to slide off and people clung to them for dear life as the sea monster pulled on them. We decided it hurt a lot when we landed on the floor anyway, so we moved the trundle mattress to the floor, which made the sea monster higher and the ship lower, but the ground softer. It was a great day of fun...until Mommy and Daddy came home. Rule 1: if you know you'll get in trouble, you probably shouldn't take pictures - esp. when you're too young to get them developed yourself.

(Originally posted April 15, 2003.)


Monday, April 14, 2003

NG Olympics

Since it's so nice out: A Summer Story

There were five us, the standard core group, my sisters Wendy and Katrina, the next-door neighbor Jennifer, and the girl down the block, Gina. Occasionally others would join us, Bethany, Danny, Jason, Dan, etc. But the five of us, we were the NG, neighborhood gang. We even had our own "company" NG Productions - we made movies. If you haven't had the pleasure (torture) of watching them, you are missing out!

Since this included the introductory info, it will be a short summer story.

We had always talked about having Olympics in the backyard, so one summer we held the NG OLYMPICS. Everyone picked a country and made a paper flag - I was Qatar. We made "medals" by cutting out cardboard circles and painting them with metallic paints. We wrote the places on them and what event they were for and hung them with red, blue and white ribbons. When one person performed, the rest of us served as judges. We had three areas of competition with different events in each area: backyard, front yard and the pool. Some events included diving, swim races, biggest splash, smallest splash, long jump into the pool, long jump off the swing, bike races, etc. It was way good fun! The biggest splashes went over the fence into the neighbors yard, the longest pool jumpers made it over the whole shallow end, the longest swing jumpers made it past the sand and we all had a great time! There's video of it somewhere.

(Originally posted April 14, 2003.)


Sunday, April 13, 2003

Little Bunny Foo-Foo

Sub-category: Vacation Stories

One time, on vacation, the family was at a restaurant for dinner. Daddy and I were arguing about something (we're both Aries), when I heard a soft voice, "Little Bunny Foo-foo". Daddy and I stopped yelling at each other and looked down the table. Sitting at the end was my mother, complete with the bunny rabbit hand, singing "Little Bunny Foo-foo". Daddy and I looked at each other and at our sisters. We all shrugged and just joined in "hopping through the forest, scooping up the field mice....". (well, Daddy didn't join in - there's always a party pooper). She may seem crazy - but Mommy stopped the fight between me and Daddy!

(Originally posted April 13, 2003.)

Saturday, April 12, 2003


Todays subtitle: Great Quotes and the Stories that Spawned Them

"When I was little, I used to make bombs." I would take the shrapnel pieces from my model cars, (the extra parts, the little bits of plastic that held the pieces together in the box, etc) and put them inside balloons. Then I would blow the balloons up nice and big and, in good 'older sister' fashion, throw them in my sister's room. Then I took a long stick (the wand from the mini-blinds that were in my bedroom) with a pin taped on the end. This way I could stand in the hall yet still "blow up" the bomb by popping the balloon with the pin.
Don't worry - I got my desserts. One time I was blowing up the balloon after I had put all the pieces in it, and it popped in my face - BOOOM!!! The little plastic pieces (and scraps of the balloon) flew all over, hitting me in the face. I got several cuts on my cheeks and arms. That was the end of making bombs.

(Originally posted April 12, 2003.)

Friday, April 11, 2003


A Summer Story
Songs We Sang While Walking to the Park!

1. The ever classic "Flying Toaster Song" from the AfterDark screensaver.

2. Hyper kids go down the street, down the street, down the street,
hyper kids go down the street,
Listen to them SCREAM (scream at top of lungs).

3. Leader: Take us to a place that's not muddy
Rest: Take us to a place that's clean
L: I don't know if I know any
R: We don't care if you get beaned
L: Sound off
R: 1 2
L: Sound off
R: 3 4
L: Sound off
All: 1 2 3 4, 12 34! (just fast, not twelve or thirty-four).

And then of course, there were the standard television theme songs and Coolio hits. (1,2,3,4 Matt and Danny are on the floor, gotta get up and run, gotta get up and run)

(Originally posted April 11, 2003.)



One time Wendy and I decided to play war in the living room. So we gathered all the pens and pencils we could find. As we were launching our projectiles at each other and diving behind furniture - Mommy came in and yelled at us. She told us to stop because we were going to get hurt throwing pens and pencils. So Wendy and I went upstairs to Katrina's room and took the packages of disposable diapers. Then we proceeded with our war in the living room, now throwing diapers at each other. For some reason, Mommy was still mad :-\ and we got yelled at again!

(Originally posted April 10, 2003.)


Thursday, April 10, 2003


(back postings of those previously listed on AIM)
I wasn't afraid to go into the bathroom in the middle of the night because of possible monsters in the shower, but because my daddy told me - you could go into the bathroom one night and walk into a wormhole and you'd never be able to come back.

(Originally posted April 10, 2003.)