Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Translating a Simple Conversation

It’s amazing how different girls and guys are.  Let’s take the following scenario.

Guy and girl are together at an event at point A. Guy needs to get to point B and girl needs to get to point C.  Getting from A to B and from A to C require going on the same overlapping route for at least half the trip.  There are public transport portals, called BART stations, at various points along the overlapping routes and at point C.

What girl says to guy: “Hey, could you drop me at a BART station that’s convenient for you?”

What girl means: “Hey could you drop me at a BART station that’s convenient for me?  I’m open to a compromise where you drop me at one that’s sort-of convenient and sort-of-not-convenient for both of us, but I know you won’t drop me at the one that’s most inconvenient to me and furthest from where I’m going even if it is the most convenient to you because that would just be mean and rude.  I’ve already shown you that I appreciate you and value your time by suggesting that you pick one convenient to you, so you should show me that you appreciate me and value my time by taking me to a BART station that isn’t inconvenient to me.

What guy hears: “Hey… BART station… convenient…”

Then guy drops girl off at the BART station closest  to point A, to where they both just were, most convenient for him, least convenient for her.

What girl thinks as he drops her off: “I can’t believe he’s dropping me off here!  I’m going to have to switch trains; it’s going to take me forever to get to point C.”

What guy thinks as he drops her off: “This is a convenient BART station.  I am a good person because I went out of my way to do exactly what she asked me to do and saved her the walk here.”

What girl thinks on her BART ride home: “It’s the end of the world!  He doesn’t like me.  If he liked me, he’d want to spend time with me and talk to me, and if he wanted to spend time with me and talk to me he would have kept me in the car longer, but he got rid of me as soon as possible so clearly he doesn’t want to talk to me or spend time with me so he clearly doesn’t like me.

He doesn’t care about what happens to me.  He dropped me off by myself at nighttime in the city, far from home.  If he cared about me, he wouldn’t want me roaming around the city by myself after dark, he would want me next to him to be sure I was protected and safe.  But he just dropped me off to let who knows what happen to me, clearly he doesn’t care about me.

He doesn’t respect me or my time, he thinks the things I do aren’t important.  He knows it’ll take me an hour to get home from this location and he could have saved me at least 20 minutes by dropping me at a different BART station. That might have cost him an extra 5 minutes but if he doesn’t think 5 minutes of his time is worth 20 minutes of my time then he clearly doesn’t value my time, and if he doesn’t value my time then he doesn’t value what I do and he thinks the things he does with his time are more important than the things I do with my time.  He’s so self-centered!"

He doesn’t respect me!   He hates me!  It’s the end of the world!

What guy is thinks on his drive home:



Sometimes, it’s tough being a girl, with all this thinking and "logic and expectations of considerate-ness….  Yeah, being a girl can be a pain, but for the cute shoes, it’s totally worth it.

1 comment:

munchkinhead said...

dont forgot the cute dresses!